The first thing I would like you to do is re-read your letter and pretend it was signed by Mary-Louise. What would you think if you heard someone else saying the exact things to me that you have? I could tell you what I think - but you will learn the lessons faster and better when you figure them out yourself.
Well done on having the strength to end an abusive relationship, that is never easy. There seems to be a strong pattern here. Either you are subconsciously doing something that's activating this odd behaviour in a series of different men or you're giving off a vibe that is attracting the exact same type of man - not a very nice one.
You thought the last guy was "decent and honest" and I get the feeling that these are the two most important qualities to you which means that you've probably had experience with men who were neither decent nor honest. If I'm correct and that is so then it means that we need to work on getting you to feel you deserve better.
Let's improve your "reading the signs" skills. Think about all these different men and what happened with them step by step. Take a giant sheet of paper and write each name across the top then underneath write the different steps the relationship took. Try writing at least ten for each. When you're finished, read them all together and see if you find a pattern. I'll be surprised if you don't. You should see the exact moment that their behaviour changed towards you. Look honestly at your own behavior and see what you were doing right before it happened. Chances are you should see something there that will help you figure out if it's something you need to stop doing. Good luck!
