First Dates pay-gate
Should men still be automatically expected to pay the whole bill on a first date, or is it OK to go halves? Actually, it doesn’t matter what you think, because this woman’s facial expression is the final word on the matter.
Bear gets spanked
Whether you think of Stephen Bear as a cheeky scamp or an utter catastrophe of a man, there’s no denying he has been long overdue a good spanking. Good thing he finally got one, then.
Cowell speaks for the nation
So this year’s breakout X Factor contestant so far is “genuine urban artist” Honey G, who is literally the live-action human equivalent of Poochie from The Simpsons. As Simon Cowell put it, “That shouldn’t happen. You shouldn’t be doing that.”
Best filthy innuendo of the week
Mary Berry needs to wash her mouth out with soap, and that’s nothing to do with what she’s eating…
Best box of hair
The Antiques Roadshow doesn’t usually make us want to hurl onto our laps, but when it comes to this particular heirloom we’ll make an exception.
Kids? What kids?
It would be pretty embarrassing if you temporarily forgot your own kids’ names on television, wouldn’t it? Yes. Yes it would.
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