Monday 21st November at 8pm on Syfy (CH 135)
Why you should watch: Noah Wyle is back to rock the geek chic for season three of this magically entertaining romp.
What’s it actually about?: A bunch of plucky heroes battle rampant deities and handle artefacts like Excalibur, while swapping quips and looking cool.
In other words: It’s Buffy meets Indiana Jones. Awesomely enough.
Example brilliance: A previous adventure starred Ash Vs Evil Dead’s Bruce Campbell as Santa Claus. Pretty sure nothing on TV can ever be as good as that.
Facial recognition analysis: Yes, that’s Rebecca Romijn, who played Mystique in the first X-Men films.
Breaking The Silence Live
Tuesday 22nd November at 8pm on Channel 4 (CH 104)
Why you should watch: Genuine TV firsts don’t come along very often, but this is exactly that.
What’s actually happening then?: We’ll watch as a group of profoundly deaf people hear sounds for the very first time in years.
Is this some Derren Brown thing?: Not at all. It’s all about clever new cochlear implants.
Example patients: We’ll meet a woman who literally went deaf overnight, and the woman who was born deaf but plays a mean piano.
Hanky readiness alert: There WILL be tears before this is over.
Legend Of Croc Gold
Thursday 24th November at 9pm on Discovery (CH 101)
Why you should watch: It’s a treasure hunt featuring grizzled miners and lots of dangerous crocodiles. What’s not to like?
What’s the gist?: Alaskan miners head to an island with lots of untapped gold reserves. And lots of dangerous crocodiles.
How dangerous?: A local teenager was literally eaten by one just before the film crew arrived.
So this is for real?: Yes. Yes it is.
Watch if you like: Gold Rush. Or any reality shows featuring risky jobs and/or animals that want to literally eat you.
Grand Designs: House Of The Year
Thursday 24th November at 9pm on Channel 4 (CH 104)
Why you should watch: Kevin McCloud, aka the nation’s dad, is back to ogle more incredible houses and pass judgement in his fondly critical way.
Why is it called House of the Year?: Because all of these homes are in the running for the Royal Institute of British Architects’ House of the Year award. And some are a bit barmy.
Example of barmy: A house whose design was inspired by abandoned sheds.
Also: A house camouflaged in a hill. We’re hoping that’s not for reasons of clinical paranoia.
Possible side-effect of watching: Suddenly realising your own home is unbelievably dull. Maybe it’s time to camouflage it in a hill?
Saturday 26th November at 9pm on BBC Four (CH 107)
Why you should watch: Prepare to sate your Nordic Noir cravings, as a dark new series arrives on BBC Four.
Who’s our hero?: Criminal profiler Inger Johanne Vik, who’s become a bit of sensation in Sweden.
What’s the gist?: Inger gets sucked into a very sinister investigation when her own daughter witnesses a murder.
Quote to get us excited: A BBC bod calls it “an exciting atmospheric thriller with an icy core”. Just the thing for wintery Saturday nights, then.
Trivia tidbit: Melinda Kinnaman, who plays Inger, is the sister of Joel Kinnaman, who was in the US remake of The Killing.
Our Guy In China
Monday 21st November at 9pm on Channel 4 (CH 104)
Why you should watch: Super-sideburned speedster Guy Martin heads out to China to see what all the darned fuss is about.
Who is Guy Martin?: You know, that chap who is a bit like a Top Gear version of Wolverine.
What’s on the agenda?: He’ll be visiting a Chinese factory to build his very own motorbike. Because simply buying one would be too easy.
Ick moment alert: He’ll also be visiting a farm which fertilises its crops with human waste.
Power station porn: Look out for the world’s largest hydroelectric power station. It’s… pretty big.
Thursday 24th November at 10pm on FOX (CH 157)
Why you should watch: It’s the return of the patriotic patriarch and his calamitous clan. Woohoo! (Sorry, that’s the wrong cartoon catchphrase isn’t it?)
Groundhog Father’s Day: In the first episode of the new run, Stan is determined to have his perfect Father’s Day. Even if that means doing it again and again until it’s right.
How?: By using a CIA mind erasing tool on his own family, of course.
What to say: “A riotously irreverent American satire that’s even more relevant in the age of Trump.”
What not to say: “We need some spin-offs, like American Aunt!, American Nephew!, and American Second-Cousin-Once-Removed!”
Thursday 24th November at 8pm on Animal Planet (CH 256)
Why you should watch: Man teaches grizzly bears to cope in the wild, in a show that’s going to be equal parts touching and terrifying.
Best TV expert of the week: The man in question is Jeff “The Bear Man” Watson, who is exactly as beardy and eccentric as a “Bear Man” should be.
Who are the bears?: Bob and Screech, a pair of rescue bears which need to be re-introduced to the great outdoors.
What to say: “A touching look at the unlikely bond between man and bear.”
What not to say: “Please don’t bite his face off, please don’t bite his face off, please don’t bite his face off.”
Gilmore Girls: A Year In The Life
Friday 25th November on Netflix
Why you should watch: It’s the mega-hyped return of the lovely comedy-drama about lovely people doing lovely things.
What’s the gist?: This belated follow-up to the original series is made up of four long episodes, each set in a different season of the year.
Are Luke and Lorelai together?: We ain’t sayin’ nothin’.
What about Richard Gilmore?: Sadly he’s no longer with us, so expect to get all teary-eyed.
Best watched with: Industrial amounts of cookies and ice cream and cake and chocolates. We won’t tell.
Gilmore Girls: A Year In The Life will be available to watch on Netflix from Friday 25th November
Whites v Blacks: How Football Changed A Nation
Sunday 27th November at 9pm on BBC Two (CH 102)
Why you should watch: It’s the greatest football tale you’ve never heard of, featuring a clash between an all-white side and an all-black side.
Necessary context: It was in 1979, a critical time in race relations, when the beautiful game had a seriously ugly side.
Will there be a grand reunion?: Oh yes. Players from both teams will meet again, which should be quite something.
Probability of getting all nostalgic for football sticker albums: 100%.
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