James Corden will be bringing his US chatshow to our fair shores, while Orange continues to be the New Black over on Netflix…
A League Of Their Own: Road Trip
Monday 5th June at 9pm on Sky1 (CH 110)
Why you should watch: It’s the return of the Stateside spin-off, where a bunch of sarky prats get up to jolly, joshing hi-jinks.
In other words: It’s a bit like Top Gear, only without the cars and more hot dog eating championships.
Who’s here?: The whole gang: Whitehall, Redknapp, Flintoff and Corden. They’re like the British Reservoir Dogs. Kind of.
Sample hi-jink: They’ll all be training as California lifeguards. Baywatch it ain’t.
Also: Jamie is somehow “injured” by hot dog eating. Your guess is as good as ours…
Monday 5th June at 9pm on Channel 5 (CH 105)
Why you should watch: Emma Willis is back to flash her best circus ringmaster smile as the latest housemates prepare to entertain us.
What’s the theme?: This time it’s “The United Kingdom of Big Brother”.
Which means?: Different rooms embody different eras in British history, complete with cake displays and chandeliers.
Why Dr David Starkey shouldn’t watch: There’s a Tudor-themed section, which is sure to make serious historians bite their fists in fury.
Ogling alert: This house has even less privacy then normal – even the shower doesn’t have any frosted glass.
Monday 5th June at 9pm on ITV2 (CH 115)
Why you should watch: Beautiful blokes and babes being very silly in the sun? Get in.
In other words: It’s the guiltiest pleasure you’ll ever have, short of eating an entire tub of Ben and Jerry’s in bed while pulling a sickie.
What’s it about again?: Perma-tanned, gym-built himbos and bimbos desperately trying to find tabloid fame. That, and true love.
Sample contestants: A motorsport grid girl! And a nuclear physicist! (We may be lying about the latter.)
Unlikeliest pseudo-celeb cameo of the week: One of the contestants is a former member of Blazin’ Squad. Oh yes.
Monday 5th June at 9pm on (CH 137)
Why you should watch: It’s a brand new crime thriller about a cocky, handsome guy taking on dangerous criminals. And don’t we all love that?
Who’s the hero?: Meet Eric Beaumont, hostage negotiator extraordinaire.
Wait, is this a reboot of the old Mel Gibson movie, Ransom?: Nope, unlike Lethal Weapon, Rush Hour and other recent TV shows, this is NOT a small screen revamp of a classic film.
What to expect: Sleek urban locations, genius insights, snappy quips, and really good looking people.
Facial recognition analysis: The main hero, Eric, is played by a Brit who used to be in Holby City.
Wednesday 7th June at 8pm on Channel 4 (CH 104)
Why you should watch: This big new series is ripped from the headlines, captures the zeitgeist, and is basically searingly relevant to life today.
What’s the gist?: In a Yorkshire town divided between its white and Asian populations, two very different schools are merged into one academy.
In other words: It’s Waterloo Road, only with even more contemporary social issues and lots of awkward stuff about race relations in Britain today.
Hot button sub-plots: The first episode includes a public speech about “food banks, smackheads and pram faces”, plus a scandal involving social media.
Look out for: A smattering of stars, including EastEnders’ Jo Joyner, and Citizen Khan’s Adil Ray.
The Late Late Show With James Corden
Wednesday 7th June at 10pm on Sky1 (CH 110)
Why you should watch: The planet’s foremost motor-mouth will be sweet talking his way through more A-list interviews.
Why it’s different than usual: James is back in Blighty!
Really?: Yes indeed. He’s relocating his hit US show back to his homeland for three special editions.
What to say: “It’ll be interesting to see how the American format translates to Corden’s native shores.”
What not to say: “Oi, Corden, stop yapping to celebs and do a Gavin & Stacey reunion.”
Orange Is The New Black
Friday 9th June on Netflix
Why you should watch: Because it’s Orange is the New Black. What more reason do you need?
Where are we at?: It’s season five time, and it’s all playing out in real-time. So expect things to get real frantic.
Was there a cliffhanger?: You bet there was, involving a gun being pointed at bad guy Humphrey’s head, and the trigger about to be pulled.
Quote to get us excited: Star Danielle Brooks says, “You better get ready. Get your popcorn, your tissues.”
Is this the final season?: There’s no early release for Orange Is The New Black addicts, with at least two seasons to go after this.
Orange Is The New Black is available to watch from Friday 9th June on Netflix
Sunday 11th June on Netflix
Why you should watch: Prepare for the fifth and final season of the clone-filled thriller.
What’s the gist?: It’s a gripping saga about a woman who realises she’s the product of a secret human cloning experiment.
And the award for hardest working actor goes to: Tatiana Maslany, who plays all the various clones of herself.
What to say: “This is more than a generic thriller. It’s a serious sci-fi spectacle asking big questions about the future of humanity.”
What not to say: “Begun, the Clone War has” (In your best Yoda voice)
Orphan Black is available to watch from Sunday 11th June on Netflix
Sunday 11th June at 9pm on BBC One (CH 101)
Why you should watch: Sundays are about to smoulder again, because it’s time for Aidan Turner to do his thing.
Where are we at?: Ross Poldark is repairing Nampara and sorting out his relationship with Demelza. We’re sure it’ll all go really smoothly without a bit of melodrama in sight.
Keep breathing: Elizabeth will be going into labour early. Yikes!
Best watched with: Tea, biscuits and a bib to catch the dribbling whenever Poldark gets his chest out.
Best not watched with: Anyone immune to Aidan Turner’s charms, because they’ll just get all huffy in the corner.
David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities
Sunday 11th June at 7pm on W (CH 125)
Why you should watch: It’s a brand new Attenborough show. You can’t not watch a brand new Attenborough show.
What’s he up to?: Oh you know, waxing lyrical about amazing animals with that Attenborough voice of his.
Yes but what’s the series about?: As the title suggests, weird and wonderful specimens that will make you feel pleasantly baffled.
First up: We meet “Animal Frankensteins” such as a pizzly bear. That’s a cross between a polar bear and a grizzly bear, natch.
Second up: It’s a double bill, so we’ll be going straight into a second episode about animals with stretched features. Which sounds… painful.