The Eurovision Song Contest 2012
BBC One - 8pm
Who's in it?
He may be in his 70s, but Engelbert Humperdinck will be crooning his heart out for Britain, alongside Europe's… er… "finest" singers for this year's Eurovision. As ever, Graham Norton will provide the long-suffering voiceover.
In a nutshell
The guiltiest pleasure of the telly calendar is back, and this time Britain means business! OK, OK, so we say that every year, only to be met with crushing disappointment. Over the past years, we've valiantly wheeled out big guns like Andrew Lloyd Webber (who wrote the 2009 entry) and of course Blue, who reformed last year and actually had the aura of winners about them. How we dared to dream, only to see them reach a lowly number 11.
But never fear, because this year we've got… a pensioner who's not had a hit song for a couple of decades. But never mind that, let's look on the positives: he's got a really cool name. He's got great hair (although it does make him look a bit like an aged Jonathan Ross). And he can still belt out a song – in this case, Love Will Set You Free. So come on, Engelbert, let's get us our first win since 1997!
What's the verdict?
Without being party poopers, it's clear that our man has his work cut out for him. Italy's Nina Zilli is the hot favourite, after all. Still, we won't get the hump if Engelbert comes second, or third, or even ninth. Just try not to get into the double digits, eh Eng?
Star rating
4/5
